Being organized is something that I value. A lot. The more organized I am, the more time I have to spend on the things I want. An acquaintance of mine called organization “key to personal freedom” and I couldn’t agree more! At the top of this list is my family, which is now a blended family of nine. Many people think I’m crazy that this is the life I have chosen to pursue. Many people wonder how I can possibly manage this. I’m going to let you in on how I stay organized with nine people and the impact this has had in my life.
I lead a very intentional life, which means I schedule my time as much as I possibly can. The things that get scheduled are the must-do’s (such as groceries, medical appointments and yes even laundry), self-care (which includes fitness, reading and meditation), activities, date nights, family time, one on one time with the kids, time with friends and so on. If it’s something that’s important to me, you can bet that I schedule it into my calendar to make sure that it happens. Does this mean I’m inflexible? Not at all. I realize that things happen and things come up and I rearrange where I can based on where it falls on my priority list. Some days I can be more flexible than others, but I always try to be accommodating when I can. You never know when that out of town relative is going to drop by unannounced, again. Or as many other parents can relate, the toddler always needs a snack. Or water. Or has peed their pants. You know, normal parenting stuff. I believe that you have to make time for things and people that are important to you. Otherwise, why would they stick around if they don’t feel valued and important?
You might be wondering if my calendar gets messy having to track nine people’s schedules. Messy is not the word I would use. Busy? Yes. But very organized. My husband to be and I evaluated some different options before settling on the one we use today. We considered the default Apple calendar, the Google calendar and other third-party apps, like Cozi. We settled on the Google calendar. That means that each member of our family has their own Google calendar. Yes, even the three-year-old has her own Google calendar. In addition to the nine individual calendars, we also have a family calendar and a parenting and work schedule calendar.
Why did we choose to this route? There were four main advantages to this option.
- I can share individual calendars with other people. An example of this is with my brother. My brother is the person who cares for the children when I’m at work and they are not at school. This has become much more lately since I’m working from home now. He has edit access to the kids calendars and is able to help me stay on top of the kids Google Meets and other school related events. I’m not really sure what I would do without him right now to be honest. He has been a lifesaver and I have no shame in asking him for help during this time. He is also a very active uncle and likes to know the going ons in the kids’ lives. Giving him access to the kid’s schedules lets him see this information freely and eliminates the need for me us to communicate about these details. This makes more room for me to focus on other important things in life.
- I can pick and choose which calendar to view based on the information I need. If I chose to use one calendar to manage all the different schedules, this would not be possible. As an example, if I wanted to see only the family calendar to make sure I had scheduled in as many family times as I want to have in my life, I can choose only that calendar making it much easier to see this information. The search function also helps me to make sure I’ve scheduled one on one time with each of the kids without having to scroll through the calendar and pick out the events themselves.
- This option will be useful in the long term. The three oldest kids already have their own devices. They are encouraged to view the calendars, which are shared with all family members, to be aware of what’s going on. They are also learning how to add events to their own calendars. My oldest daughter had a virtual sleepover last weekend and I encouraged her to add it to her calendar so that we could all be aware of what was going on. Yes, I could have done it myself, but I am also teaching and empowering the kids to do things for themselves as they are able to. The goal is that they will be able to manage their own time and calendar as they get older. I am helping them create some positive habits in their life now that will serve them well in the future.
- My original family uses Apple devices and my partner’s uses Android devices. Google calendars was a solution that worked regardless of the platform it was being used on.
Being organized means I get to spend more time on the areas that are important to me and where I really want to focus my time and energy. This is very important when having to manage schedules for a family of nine. Google calendars is a long-term solution that is easy, user-friendly and collaborative. It has been working really well for my family and I would definitely recommend it for other families.
How do you keep your family organized? What tools do you use? What types of things get scheduled in your calendar? I want to hear all about it in the comments below!
Val, when I was your neighbour, I admired your organizational skills and commitment to your fitness and family. I wanted to be more like you! I remember telling you that I did 12 months of books at once and you cringed because of being an accountant and the importance of being on top of things. Have you always been this way? I have never been, but aspire to be. Now that I have 2 kids, a farm with many jobs, depression that comes and goes and leaves me completely exhausted, I struggle to maintain any kind of balance. By the end of the day, and many meltdowns later, I ignore the dishes, the laundry, even bedtime stories and just melt into bed. Only to remain awake for several more hours, restless and searching… how to be better. How to “fix” things. I will say though,. That in the past year, I am able to let the laundry and dishes go without beating myself up like I used to. Comparing myself to others (as I once did with you even), and just be ok with where I am at. On the other hand, I do recognize that my house reflects my mind, and I am about ready to be done with the clutter, the disorganization, the frustration, the stress. So I have hired a professional organizer to come help me stay on track during purges and cleans. Her job is not to retrain me to be organized, but to help me to get to a manageable point with possessions, where things should go etc… for what works for my whole family. In doing so, I am letting things go that no longer serve me, and with her being there, I also feel validated… having someone witness my hard work and my commitment to change. As my husband is gone all the days and all the nights during farming season, he doesn’t truly appreciate what I go through personally. All the little things. All the little victories. Slowly, I feel like I am getting there. I just wanted you to know that I appreciate you. Where you’ve been, what you’ve been through, and where you are now. I’ve always thought you were wonderful and I love reading what you post. Thank you for being an open book, maybe you don’t know how many people you help but you’ve helped me!
You have a beautiful new family and I see and feel the joy emanating from you. You have some lucky kids to have such a committed and conscious mommy like you. All the best,
Lisa
Thanks for the detailed reply and kind words Lisa! You probably don’t realize it but I admired that you were so social! It seemed so natural to you! Something I used to struggle with, but no more! I’ve always tried to be organized though I have failed in many areas in the past and now excel in them. I have learned the importance of balance in my life now and how to maintain that with certain tools. I remember when I had gotten to the point of letting things go in order to be able to enjoy the life I had. It was necessary. It wasn’t where I wanted to stay though. I wanted to be thriving so I figured out how to do that and have not regretted a moment of the work I had to do to get here! Keep moving forward, regardless of how long it takes you! And don’t hesitate to reach out if I can help you on your journey in any way! All the love,
Val